Now Reading | Adrienne Rich on Lying, What “Truth” Really Means, and the Alchemy of Human Possibility
http://www.brainpickings.org/2014/11/13/adrienne-rich-women-honor-lying/?utm_content=bufferf5f3f&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer
“I fling unconscious tendrils of belief, like slender green threads, across statements such as these, statements made so unequivocally, which have no tone or shadow of tentativeness. I build them into the mosaic of my world. I allow my universe to change in minute, significant ways, on the basis of things you have said to me, of my trust in you.
When we discover that someone we trusted can be trusted no longer, it forces us to reexamine the universe, to question the whole instinct and concept of trust. For a while, we are thrust back onto some bleak, jutting ledge, in a dark pierced by sheets of fire, swept by sheets of rain, in a world before kinship, or naming, or tenderness exist; we are brought close to formlessness.”
I came across this article by Maria Popova and it drew me in. How beautiful these words and sentiments are. Trust is so key to every relationship, especially business relationships, and I found this essay to be powerful and insightful. In her writings that Popova discovered and publishes here in this article, Adrienne Rich writes about what is really at stake when people lie, and how the act destroys our basic humanity.
The liar lives in fear of losing control. They cannot even desire a relationship without manipulation, since to be vulnerable to another person means for them the loss of control.
The liar has many friends, and leads an existence of great loneliness.
She goes on to say specifically of women, “When a woman tells the truth she is creating the possibility for more truth around her.” What a responsibility women leaders, in particular, have to demonstrate truth to themselves and to the people looking to them and watching them as they handle the day to day issues in the workplace. I believe as leaders, especially women leaders, we must hold ourselves to an even higher standard of integrity.
I love this qualification of possibilities between human beings and how once lies enter the relationship, the possibilities can no longer be recognized.
The possibilities that exist between two people, or among a group of people, are a kind of alchemy. They are the most interesting thing in life. The liar is someone who keeps losing sight of these possibilities.
When relationships are determined by manipulation, by the need for control, they may possess a dreary, bickering kind of drama, but they cease to be interesting. They are repetitious; the shock of human possibilities has ceased to reverberate through them.
It’s Monday. It’s a new week. Let’s work hard to build trust today within our organizations, with our teams, with our loved ones, and with the strangers we interact with. Let’s be kind, not selfish. Let’s be generous, not manipulative. Collectively, let’s watch out for the next generation of leaders who are looking to us for truth and integrity.
The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is. | Winston Churchhill
